This was so fascinating and thoughtful to read. I think your video about how your spouse shouldn't be your best friend resonated with me because one thing i am really glad my brother in law has is a good core group of "guy friends". They play pool, they go out drinking, they watch sports, but I think its good for both him and my sister to have different outlets. I wish more men had guy friends, i think it would help a ton.
This essay has so many eerie parallels to my life. Honestly, I would have been your hot mess friend that you spent time with before the pandemic. I don't even recognize that version of myself anymore. It's been a ghost town on most of my friendships post-COVID. I'm in the weird season of *almost* empty nest phase and now that I'm here, all I see is tumbleweeds. I am getting passionate about solo dates and doing things singularly for me, but I miss some elements of my old social life. I can't wait to see what you write and champion it, my friend, which leads me to THANK YOU for highlighting my summer reading guide and the Book Gang podcast. This podcast was my pandemic project and it brought you into my circle. I'm so grateful!
Thank you as always for being such a support and I'm happy to help in any way! I'm excited to take your recs and have some chats about the books we share this summer!
This was phenomenal and so well written! I empathize with the changing nature of friendship and also showing up for yourself more in writing. You are talented!
I could 100% see myself in "I felt I was a consumer and a curator: I always knew what was in the zeitgeist, what was good, what people were furious about or loving." And your thoughts on reaching your thirties and not necessarily conforming to what society deems as 'having made it'.
Your embrace of a more creative life made me think of the idea that sometimes change needs the right community: https://www.are.na/block/31681093
I love that the creative life is working out for you and also glad for selfish reasons, since we get to read your writing!!
Amazing read! I’ve loved following you online the past few years. I’m now entering a second party girl wave at 27 and also stepping into my creativity. And i feel no personal rush into marriage/family life. Cheers to new chapters and the friends we cherish along the way ❤️
As someone who met you once at a party in 2022, I can affirm that you were a simply sparkling party guest! I see so many parallels here with my own life. Court jester and party girl working on a novel slowly too. Solidarity, friend!! <3
When I think about all the friends I used to go out with in my 20s, I sometimes feel tricked. I thought we were going out to have fun and because we enjoyed each other; drinking, dancing, getting ready, eating drunk food late night. Nobody told me the whole time we were just on a man hunt???????
I'm married and I'm happy. I was gonna say I miss the friends I used to have who completely changed when they partnered up (phase 1) and had kids (phase 2). But the truth of the matter is, I resent them. I feel so foolish to just have been a bit part of their boring life plot.
It's so odd bc it's such a normal part of life but also feels like such a bait and switch? I'm happy you settled down as well, being on the outside as everyone sails off into their new lives is so tough.
Standing strong with you! The grass isn't always greener but it also is a very valid hurt to feel left behind. Find some single friends and don't let the hurt overtake the friendships, as someone who's been on both sides of this!
I related to this so hard, I think I'm going to upgrade to paid! Your tiktok discourses have helped me so much during this weird phase of life. Thanks for putting yourself out there for us all to feel a little less solo!
This was so fascinating and thoughtful to read. I think your video about how your spouse shouldn't be your best friend resonated with me because one thing i am really glad my brother in law has is a good core group of "guy friends". They play pool, they go out drinking, they watch sports, but I think its good for both him and my sister to have different outlets. I wish more men had guy friends, i think it would help a ton.
This essay has so many eerie parallels to my life. Honestly, I would have been your hot mess friend that you spent time with before the pandemic. I don't even recognize that version of myself anymore. It's been a ghost town on most of my friendships post-COVID. I'm in the weird season of *almost* empty nest phase and now that I'm here, all I see is tumbleweeds. I am getting passionate about solo dates and doing things singularly for me, but I miss some elements of my old social life. I can't wait to see what you write and champion it, my friend, which leads me to THANK YOU for highlighting my summer reading guide and the Book Gang podcast. This podcast was my pandemic project and it brought you into my circle. I'm so grateful!
Thank you as always for being such a support and I'm happy to help in any way! I'm excited to take your recs and have some chats about the books we share this summer!
This resonates SO much, I’ve experienced similar chronicles.
This was phenomenal and so well written! I empathize with the changing nature of friendship and also showing up for yourself more in writing. You are talented!
This was a phenomenal read. I really caught a lot of myself in what you wrote, and that’s why this meant so much to me. Bravo!
“It’s hard to understand deprivation when you feast every night.” This gave me chills! This quote could be applied to so much right now…..
Fascinating
Thank you for sharing this.
I could 100% see myself in "I felt I was a consumer and a curator: I always knew what was in the zeitgeist, what was good, what people were furious about or loving." And your thoughts on reaching your thirties and not necessarily conforming to what society deems as 'having made it'.
Your embrace of a more creative life made me think of the idea that sometimes change needs the right community: https://www.are.na/block/31681093
I love that the creative life is working out for you and also glad for selfish reasons, since we get to read your writing!!
Thank you!!
Amazing read! I’ve loved following you online the past few years. I’m now entering a second party girl wave at 27 and also stepping into my creativity. And i feel no personal rush into marriage/family life. Cheers to new chapters and the friends we cherish along the way ❤️
As someone who met you once at a party in 2022, I can affirm that you were a simply sparkling party guest! I see so many parallels here with my own life. Court jester and party girl working on a novel slowly too. Solidarity, friend!! <3
If I could figure out how to insert a teary eye emoji I'd put it here- Thank you for reading and good luck on the novel!!!
When I think about all the friends I used to go out with in my 20s, I sometimes feel tricked. I thought we were going out to have fun and because we enjoyed each other; drinking, dancing, getting ready, eating drunk food late night. Nobody told me the whole time we were just on a man hunt???????
I'm married and I'm happy. I was gonna say I miss the friends I used to have who completely changed when they partnered up (phase 1) and had kids (phase 2). But the truth of the matter is, I resent them. I feel so foolish to just have been a bit part of their boring life plot.
It's so odd bc it's such a normal part of life but also feels like such a bait and switch? I'm happy you settled down as well, being on the outside as everyone sails off into their new lives is so tough.
This made me feel better about seeing all the wedding/engagement photos as someone very newly single
Standing strong with you! The grass isn't always greener but it also is a very valid hurt to feel left behind. Find some single friends and don't let the hurt overtake the friendships, as someone who's been on both sides of this!
I related to this so hard, I think I'm going to upgrade to paid! Your tiktok discourses have helped me so much during this weird phase of life. Thanks for putting yourself out there for us all to feel a little less solo!
Really appreciate your writing. Thank you for sharing this.
oh this is telling me something i very much need to but dont want to hear.......
chile... been there :x good luck on the journey!